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[flippin_peachy]

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[hawk_shot]

Well, get used to that and more. Because you're stuck with me and I consider you family already.

[flippin_peachy]

I consider it an honor to be considered that.

[hawk_shot]

Just as I consider it an honor to have a Christmas sock of my own at Bruce's place.

Seriously, you guys made me feel so incredibly welcomed from day one.
And you Alfred. Since we met you went the extra mile for me.

[flippin_peachy]

I hope you found it to your liking, I made sure it was purple.

Well of course, your Mum was always very special to me so it stands to reason you should be to.

[hawk_shot]

See? You spoil me.

Even when I was a total brat when we first met?

[flippin_peachy]

You weren't that bad, I've dealt with much worse.

[hawk_shot]

Really?

Because I look back at that first time we met (me being super late included) and all I can think of is how much you must love my mom to have put up with all of that.

[flippin_peachy]

Well you've met Selina.

[That's an accurate turn of phrase considering his past with her Mum....]

It didn't take you that long to drop the attitude.

[hawk_shot]

Okay, yeah, I'm not going to argue that point.

Thankfully. I would feel like SHIT now if I had been even worse than I was.

[flippin_peachy]

Didn't think so.

You were fine, in fact your attitude reminded me a bit of your Mum's when she was young so mostly it was just amusing to me.

[hawk_shot]

I saw Bruce with her on the streets the other day. I didn't want to interrupt.

...
How was my mom when she was younger?
Aside from someone who apparently dressed as the condom fairy.

[flippin_peachy]

That's probably wise, he's still shy about his feelings for her even though they're as subtle as a brick wall.

She was a spitfire.
Strong, determined and wicked smart.

[hawk_shot]

Wait a minute, they're not official yet???

Who met the british badass dude and instantly became BFFs?

[flippin_peachy]

I have no idea, that's their business and I try to not get involved unless he comes to me with questions.

Pretty much, yes.

[hawk_shot]

Has he ever come to you asking for relationship advice?
Have you taught him to shave yet, Alfred?

Wish mom had told me more about you, from that side of things. I feel like she never tells me anything... Personal. The stuff that matters.

[flippin_peachy]

Yes, he has.
I taught him last year actually even though he hasn't really needed to do it.

Sometimes it's hard to tell your child about certain parts of your life.

[hawk_shot]

About Selina or did he have a girlfriend before her?
That's so adorable.

What's so hard about telling me about a super close friend? Specially as she spent the last year and a half bringing this super annoying guy home who took the libery of calling himself my step-dad.
...
Now I know he wasn't a bad guy, but Jack was annoying as hell.

[flippin_peachy]

About Selina. She's the first girl he's liked.

Because it was a very long time ago, Kate. And she might have felt embarrassed to tell you things like the condom fairy.

That does seem rather presumptions of him.

[hawk_shot]

Has he taken her on a real date yet?

Are all your memories together about dirty costumes? Because unless that's the case, it makes zero sense to me.

That would be an understatement.
The guy would bring me flowers or tell me about how he got a book about parenting. It was so cringey.

[flippin_peachy]

Yes, he has. He took her to the Wayne charity ball.

No, not all of them. But let me ask you this, do you tell your mother everything about your life?

It sounds like he was just nervous and trying to make a good impression on you.

[hawk_shot]

Shit, how do you handle how adorable they are??

... That's different.

Maybe. But he was trying a little too hard.

[flippin_peachy]

I guess I'm just used to it.

How so?

Probably because he was worried.

[hawk_shot]

Probably. But still the cutest thing ever.

... Because... I don't know, it's just weird to know about every thing your daughter does, isn't it?
But she... Now I understand why she wouldn't talke about things. She's probably ashamed of herself.

Probably. But he skipped a bullet with mom. Literally.

[flippin_peachy]

I suppose.

It works both ways then, it's weird to know everything your Mum does isn't it?
Gee thanks.

I don't find that very amusing.

[hawk_shot]

You suppose? C'mon!

Well, yeah! But it's still different.
I'm not saying that that involves you!

But it's true. Alfred, she framed him.